Writing

I always have these ideas for plays or stories. But I never write them. Why? Because I always feel unprepared. I remember when I was twelve I started writing a novel that took place in New York City. I got my first taste of unpreparedness. I had not been to New York at that point. I was undoubted writing a stereo type of Gotham City based on what I had seen on television. Now I look back and think that I could have made the city any city or a ficticious city. I was confounded by my lack of knowledge about the geography of the city. I asked my dad to buy me a map of manhattan. He asked me why. I didn't want to tell him that I was writing a novel so I said "I don't know," and dropped it. I ultimately dropped the novel too. I wonder how many words I have tabled and forgotten because of that unpreparedness. Its ironic because when my student write I tell them that its important "just to write." Sift through ninety nine pounds of coal for a half karat diamond. I can't bring myself to practice what I teach.

Chris asked me during my sophmore year in college, "Do you enjoy writing?" And I responded with a resounding yes. But as I've already admitted previously, there are times where I think I just like the image of the writer. I enjoy writing here when I have a topic to write about. I don't want to feel like my writing is contrived. I can write about my ideas or the things going on in my life because I am the expert on my life and ideas. But when it comes to writing real, flesh and blood characters going through a traumatic experience or finding the funny in life I feel ill equipped.